Ways to Keep A Healthy Level of Sanity

I got these in a forward from Husband’s aunt, and they made me laugh, so I’m sharing with you all!

1.At lunch time, sit In your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars.. see if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom.  Don’t disguise your voice!

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks.  Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

5. In the “memo” field of all your checks, write “for marijuana.”

6. Skip down the hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.

7. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, keeping a serious face.

8. Specify that your drive-through order is “to go.”

9. Sing along at the opera.

10. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you have a headache.

11. When money comes out at the ATM, scream “I won!  I won!”

12. When leaving the zoo, start running toward the parking lot, yelling, “Run for your lives!  They’re loose!”

13.  Tell one of your children over dinner, “Due to the economy, we’re going to have to let one of you go.”

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2 thoughts on “Ways to Keep A Healthy Level of Sanity

  1. Those are great! Well, except for the last one…I just cannot imagine saying something like that to my kids, although my kids are pretty young. Maybe if I had teens, and they knew what was going on with the economy and such, it would be fun!

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